Final Sabbatical Event a Celebration

Argentina has been making a big splash in the news recently, but it was not Governor Sanford's mistress or the parliamentary elections which captured our focus at Christ Congregational Church this past weekend. No, we gathered as a congregation to celebrate the marvelous gift of renewal pastor & congregation experienced this past year with an Argentinean dinner, surrounded by the sights and sounds of Argentina in our Fellowship Hall. With some photo posters decorating the walls bringing Buenos Aires, Bariloche, and Machu Picchu to life, about 40 members and friends of the church gathered to enjoy las comidas de Argentina, prepared by Tango's Restaurant & Bakery. Typical fare such as Ensalada Rusa (potato salad w/peas & carrots), Chorizos, Entrana ala Verdeo (grilled churrasco steak with a Chardonnay scallion sauce), Gnocchi Alfredo and a variety of mini desserts, was enjoyed by all with the Tango music of Carlos Gardel serenading in the background.

After dinner I shared some final reflections on the Sabbatical experience for myself as Pastor, with a montage of photos from Argentina and Peru projected in the background. Those reflections were drawn primarily from this blog, so I will just summarize them in this post. I began by reminiscing on the dreamlike quality of the adventure of twelve weeks in South America, seventeen weeks of not working, learning Spanish as an alien in distant lands. The primary blessing I would identify of the Sabbatical was the time for reflection on my life, on the world, on my work life and on my call to ministry. That has especially become clear to me eight months removed from the experience. It is so difficult to claim time in my regular schedule for simply sitting and reflecting on life and the world. For a pastor that is especially sad. Historically, reflection time has been a major element of the pastoral role and a significant part of why we are given the privilege of financial support by a community for this ministry. Without ample reflection time it becomes increasingly difficult to adequately feed the people of the community through sermons and writings.

In addition to ample time for reflection, I summarized my learning on the sabbatical in five areas:

1. The basics of the Spanish language. Difficult as it has been to maintain the level of fluency I developed in Argentina, I did learn the basic structure of the language, the basic verb tenses and conjugations, and a basic vocabulary on which I can build. I know I will continue to grow in my ability to use Spanish and I see evidence of it, albeit baby steps, every day.

2. How much I love to travel and how much it nurtures my soul. I have already reflected on this in another part of the blog, but it is clear to me that I need to continue to seek ways and means to incorporate significant travel experiences into my life. It is one of the most renewing experiences possible for me.

3. A renewed sense of what is truly important for me. First: my family. Second: Paying attention to and nurturing quality relationships with people. That includes my family, but also those to whom I minister as pastor. Third: Nurturing time for reflection about life. Fourth: Importance of developing outside interests beyond my work as pastor.

4. The importance of maintaining a flexible and creative approach to life, relationships, and spirituality. When we are rigid in our desire to seek control of life, we are less able to go with the flow. As a result, life becomes more of a burden and less enjoyable. When we can adapt with some flexibility to whatever situations arise in our lives, then we can find the good, even in the bad, and we can continue to see the beauty and blessings in life all around us.

5. The importance of trusting myself and others to accomplish what needs to be done. We completed the Sabbatical Grant Application within three months time. I planned my time away within a year. I went away and the congregation did not fall apart. In fact, it thrived. I return from the Sabbatical with a new freedom to be Pastor in this place in a new way. I am taking clear steps to take on less responsibility, to trust others to assume more responsibility, to support, encourage, and assist them in that process. The result will be, I am sure, a stronger church community more completely living out its call to be the body of Christ, the people of God in this place. It will also lead to a healthier, more renewed, and better pastor, who will find the time for reflection and be better able to inspire and guide the people of God.

On Saturday, with the assistance of the Rev. Dr. John Manrodt from the Counseling Ministry of South Florida, about 22 people returned to spend time reflecting on what the sabbatical experience was like for them as a congregation. After some creative exercises to help stimulate that thinking and sharing, we spent some time looking toward the future and what it means for us as a church and pastor that we have had this experience. Some positive plans began to grow out of those discussions and everyone seemed to leave with excitement and a forward thinking approach to the future of Christ Congregational Church.

While this weekend will probably be the final planned event related to the Sabbatical, the experience of planning for, living the adventure, and re-engaging life and ministry afterwards, will continue to have an impact and influence for years to come. It was a marvelous gift. For me from the people of Christ Congregational Church in terms of their support and their allowing me the time to pursue. For all of us from the people of the Lily Foundation who made it possible financially with their generous Clergy Renewal Grant.

The adventure continues, though not in South America, but right here in Miami and I look forward to continuing to reflect upon Sabbath and sabbatical concerns, especially the dance between Sabbath time and regular time, the Sabbath Tango.

A Birthday Gift to Myself

It was a type of "mini-sabbatical" today. Since it was my birthday I decided to take most of the day "off" from work. An additional round of golf for the week was my gift to myself. About 9 a.m. I called my regular golf partner, Frank, to see what he was doing for the day, and then we spontaneously visited a course we have played before, but not our regular course. The day was beautiful, bright blue skies, with clouds floating by in lazy fashion. It is a slightly easier course than we normally play, but even so, Frank shot one of his best rounds in a long time, an 81! I told him it was my "gift" to him (to let him beat me on my birthday! I shot an 87, still pretty good.) Being in a good mood after that, Frank bought me lunch at his favorite French Cafe. We enjoyed Prosciutto d'Amore on ciabbata bread sandwiches, and French coffee! Nice, relaxing morning! After getting cleaned up I then spent a little time in the afternoon engaging in pastoral care work, visiting some of my parishioners who live at East Ridge Retirement Village. I know you are not supposed to work on a "sabbatical," but I have been needing to see some of these folks for quite some time and they were very pleased to see me. Pastoral care, especially of this sort, is actually very enjoyable and even somewhat relaxing for me, sort of like visiting good friends. Especially since the conversations for these folks include some sharing of my life and of events and activities at the church, as a way of sharing news and connecting them with the wider world, as well as listening to them share about their lives, their families and friends, etc.

These sorts of days need to be a regular part of all of our lives. I know they are difficult for me to take and enjoy, as I am very responsible and very driven in terms of how much work I am aware is always needing my attention and energy. Yet I also know that God's design for humanity and the creation includes a regular sabbath every seventh day. While I am pretty good about taking my day off each week, there needs to be regular special days of rest, reflection, meditation, in my schedule for me to be re-energized and for me to do more than just the regular work that is part of a pastor's schedule. More and more that work has become task oriented and less and less the work of one who reflects on life and seeks the deeper theological insights into life.

But today was a day to reclaim some of that ability. It was a day for me. It was a day for sharing with family and friends. It was a day for thinking about life and for blogging. Now if I can just claim a day like this sooner than a year from now when my birthday rolls around again. Then I will be making real progress on implementing a learning from my sabbatical!

Pastor as Poet Needs Time for Reflection

Since returning from my Sabbatical there has been an increasing restlessness and dis-ease in my soul. I returned to work with renewed energy. I was well rested; my mind and my spirit were rejuvenated. My stress level was greatly lowered and my ability to cope with stress without unhealthy reactions was improved.

However, as I move further along in my work as pastor, I find it difficult to keep my attention and my energy focused. Initially I attributed this to the difficulty of returning to work routine after four months away from that routine. But it has been three-plus months back at the routine (almost as long as the entire sabbatical had been) and those difficulties persist, instead of lessening.

Today I read an article on the Christian Century web-site which struck a chord deep within and perhaps begins to help me identify something of what may be going on. The article is excerpted from M. Craig Barnes's book The Pastor as Minor Poet, published by Eerdmans. Barnes teaches at Pittsburgh Theological Seminary and he presents another way of viewing the role and work of the local church pastor: as a poet. He is not advocating for us to write verse, but rather describing our calling with the analogy. Here is a brief excerpt from the article.

In contrast to the biblical and theological poets, the pastoral poet has the unique calling of making sense of their words in light of the dust and grit of daily life in a parish. And unlike those whom society has traditionally revered as poets, whose vision of the deeper reality is nurtured through quiet sanctuary, if not isolation, the pastor-poet lives with a crowded and noisy soul. Central to what it means to be ordained is to open the doors of one's soul to the complexities, pathos, longings and even sins of those the pastor has vowed to serve.

At the same time, the pastor is even more attentive to the unapparent presence of God among the people of the congregation. One of the reasons that people need pastors is precisely that God is always present but usually not apparent. It takes a poet to find that presence beneath the layers of strategy for coping with the feeling of its absence. Thus, the parish minister's soul becomes a crucible in which sacred visions are ground together with the common and at times profane experiences of human life. Out of this sacred mix, pastors find their deep poetry, not only for the pulpit but also for making eternal sense out of the ordinary routines of the congregation.

Pastors' days are filled with committee meetings that never end and accomplish little; confirmation classes with kids who can't be cool unless they look bored; races across town to make a hospital call, only to discover that the patient was just discharged (You're not getting credit for this one); counseling sessions with people who don't like their jobs but can't afford to quit them because they need them to afford lifestyles they don't really like either; funerals where they fight back their tears long enough to lead worship; weddings where they fight back aggressive photographers; conflicts with people who just won't leave the church; and the relentless return of Sundays that demand another profound sermon. And through it all, the attentive pastor is constantly spinning the poetry, helping the congregation to see the sacred subtext of their lives.

As poets, pastors are always looking for a portal that invites passage into a deeper, more mysterious—and thus true—understanding of what is seen. …

What if, instead of working so hard at omnicompetence, pastors were free to work hard simply at being better poets? And is it possible that the call to parish ministry can come not at the expense of our souls, but at their delight—the joy known only by those who can behold mystery and truth at work just beneath the surface of all the belief and all the reality of parish life?

One of the things learned on my sabbatical was the importance for me, as pastor, to have time to reflect on life, on the world, on the church. Without realizing it, I tapped into the importance of the pastor as poet, who “is always looking for a portal that invites passage into a deeper, more mysterious – and thus true – understanding of what is seen.” But to nurture that role, we need time. And the modern pastoral schedule does not allow for that sort of reflective, meditative, time. I am usually lucky to find a few minutes a day for quiet prayer! (Actually, I have been very good about maintaining the discipline of my daily four mile walk to the bay which provides me about 80 minutes of solitude and quiet time for prayer and meditation as I walk. It may also be part of the time necessary for me to use for poetic reflection.)

It is not easy to reclaim one’s schedule in order to direct it more for “poetic reflection” than for “technocratic managerial” tasks. Everything in our culture entices us and draws us toward “omnicompetence” and a technician mentality that approaches life as a problem for which we just need to identify the right solution, the right formula to correct and improve it, the right script.

The attitude and view of the poet, however, is an embracing of life to fully drink it in, fully absorb it, and then begin to understand the deeper meanings above, below, and within. Life is not a problem to be corrected, but a wonderful ride, or marvelous adventure, to be experienced fully through complete and total immersion. The poet does not shy away from pain, or try to mask or cover-up the sorrow and suffering, but embraces these experiences, too, as fully part of what it means to be alive.

Perhaps my restlessness arises from a need deep in my soul for this sort of exploration and embracing of life. While on sabbatical I uncovered once again my love for writing, especially free-flowing, reflective writing, and I discovered how nurturing this practice is for my soul. Since I have been back to work it has been difficult to find the time to spend at my computer, or with my journal, pen in hand, and just write freely about … anything… and everything. Whether my schedule and responsibilities allow for me to fully do so or not, clearly I need to consciously commit to nurturing my poet!