The Power of Memory: Remembering & Reliving the Sabbatical

While on a roll, I want to post something other than a complaint-based rant. There have actually been a number of experiences and reflections I have enjoyed this month, related to my Sabbatical of last year, that I just never found the time to sit down and write about on my blog. (That is part of the source of the complaint-based rant.) So, today, my last day of vacation in Chicago, I want to share some reflections on remembering the Sabbatical this month.

When July 1 rolled around this year I discovered a strong sense of melancholy also arrived with the turning of the calendar page. I began remembering exactly where I was and what I was doing one year ago: Paul and I had just arrived in Minnesota; Paul and I were entering the Boundary Waters via canoe; there were no fire-works on the Fourth of July last year as Paul and I were deep in the north woods, far away from civilization. That experience has continued almost all month. In fact, other people have joined me in remembering. My daughter-in-law, Erika, commented last night that I have set a precedent now, two years in a row in Chicago visiting them in July. There are now expectations that I will return to Chicago again in July now that the precedent is set! It was also noted shortly after we arrived this year that last year at this time we had actually just left Chicago to head to St. Louis. I was also very aware on my father's birthday this year, July 19, that last year we were in St. Louis just a few days before his birthday to celebrate with him and this year he is no longer with us, having died in February.

There was another incident earlier in the month that evoked a slightly different take on this nostalgia. Early in July one Saturday morning, in fact I believe it was the Fourth, I made my morning walk to the bay and upon arrival was greeted by several folks embarking from the landing area for a day of fishing from kayaks. As I stood on the landing watching two of the kayaks paddle off toward the bay into the rising sun it seemed to me they were in the wrong place. They should have been paddling away from the Sawbill Landing heading out into a wilderness adventure in the Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness in northern Minnesota!

There is no memory I can recall of ever having experienced this same sort of nostalgia so strongly as I am experiencing right now around my Sabbatical experience of one year ago. Will this be prominent in my thoughts and feelings for the next three months? Will I in essence relive the Sabbatical in some form this year? And what about in the years to come? Will I have some of these same thoughts and feelings every year during July, August, September and October? Vivid memories are a common part of my life. But never do I recall this strong recollection of where I was and what I was doing at the same time one year ago as I am experiencing with the Sabbatical. Perhaps this is another indication of what a once-in-a-lifetime, life-changing, foundational experience was my adventure of last year.

(The pictures are from the time in the Boundary Waters last year. Just a chance to share more of my thousands of photos with you and to share some of my nostalgia.)

The Difficulty of Learning the Sabbath Tango

Here it is July 22, 2009, and I am making my first post for the month! Last year, even with six days in the wilderness of Northern Minnesota, I already had several posts by this time. In fact, by the 22nd of July, 2008, I was on my way back to Miami after the first three weeks of my Sabbatical feeling very refreshed, relaxed and ready for my South American adventure! This July 22 I am finishing up my one-week vacation, enjoying a final full day in Chicago, and wondering where the vacation time went to so fast?!? One-week of vacation is not nearly enough time off to accomplish what a vacation needs to do in terms of restoring the body, mind and soul. For example, I am just now getting over a cold that is trying to become bronchitis. This hit me two days ago, about half-way through the vacation. It took my body 4 days to realize it was on vacation before it could consider whether it wanted to get sick for vacation or not! It took my mind a good three days to realize it was on vacation before it began to shift into relaxation mode. It has taken my spirit about six days to realize it was on vacation to where I was ready to begin engaging in spirit-renewing activities, such as writing in my journal, or my blog, and reading a book just for fun! Of course, I return to Miami tomorrow and back to work on Friday, so body will have had about 4 days of vacation, 2-3 of them fighting illness; my mind will have had about 5 days of vacation, also 2-3 days of that clouded by my body's illness; and my spirit will have had about 2 days of vacation.

And that is how most of my time off this year is shaping up. We had this week in Chicago to celebrate my wife Dianne's birthday (and we had a wonderful time with our family in Chicago, Jim, Erika, and granddaughters, Madeleine & Shelby.) I will next take a 4.5 days early in August to drive with my daughter,Rebekah, to Pennsylvania to help her get settled in her apartment for Law School which begins later that month. Then, after returning to Miami, a week later I will fly with my son, Paul, out to Salt Lake City, Utah, to help him get settled in Westminster College for his freshman year. I will take about 8 days to make that trip, and the last two days will probably be alone time for me as it appears that the orientation schedule does not include parents on Monday or Tuesday. (That is fine with me, at least I will get a little bit of solo vacation out of the trip!) Then Dianne and I are planning to take a 10 day trip this September, probably to California. Perhaps that will be a long enough experience to bring full refreshment and renewal to my body, mind & soul?!

I am not really complaining, as much as I am bemoaning several realities. First, the fact that we expect too much out of too little far too often in our society. We expect a one or two week vacation to make up for the other 50 highly stressful, highly taxing, highly exhausting weeks we spend at work, at volunteer activities, at household chores, etc. We expect one-hour a week on Sunday mornings to renew our relationship with God and to restore our spiritual health to a balanced place to take us through the week. Our bodies, minds and spirits need regular renewal time and periodic intense, extended renewal time, for good health. It is the way we were created. Besides all the medical studies highlighting this truth, God's plan as detailed in the Bible also teaches us the same thing. God established the Sabbath at the very beginning creating the world: after six days of work, God rested. God knew when to take a break and God taught us that we need to do the same thing. Yet how infrequently do we really take a weekly Sabbath? If we are lucky enough any more to not work on Saturday or Sunday we almost always fill both days with chores and other high levels of activity. How often do we stop to ask ourselves if something we are planning to do will be renewing to our body, mind, spirit, or family relationships?

The other reality I find very sad is that there is so little acknowledgement of the importance of family and family relationships in the structure of our employment practices. I remember when the Family Leave Act was passed by Congress back in the '90's that mandated employers to allow mothers and fathers time off work for the birth or adoption of a baby. It was a major battle to get this law passed! Most employers do not allow for separate sick-leave days for caring for a family member: an employee must use their sick leave, which in most cases is pretty minimal for the year, especially when it must be divided between the employee and one or more dependents. Most employers do not allow for time off for attending to other family care situations: like attending graduations, taking children off to college, etc. To do such a parent must use vacation time. Now I realize there might always be people who would abuse some benefit, but I also realize that we as a society are extremely driven to succeed at all costs, especially when it comes to turning a profit. We have very little humane and compassionate practices in our economic, business, and social relationships. And the church gets sucked right into the same attitudes and practices. This is very sad.

But I am thankful for a caring and understanding congregation of people who, while they expect a lot out of their pastor and like for him to be available 24/7/365, still realize he is a human being who needs time away for renewal and refreshment. They are fairly flexible and as long as I am there at the critical moments, for the most part they allow me space and encourage me to find Sabbath Time so that I can be healthy, whole, and a better person and pastor. Finding such is part of the difficult dance known as Sabbath Tango. As I learned in Argentina one does not pick-up the Tango, and definitely not master it, in just a few lessons. It takes years of practice. Even so with the Sabbath Tango.

(The pictures include: A brown bear cooling himself at the Brookfield Zoo, he definitely seems to have a better handle on the Sabbath Tango than I do; Dianne & I with our children preparing to go out to celebrate her birthday with a fabulous dinner; a view of the Chicago River from the boat tour we enjoyed; a photo of me & Dianne and taking a photo of ourselves and the Chicago skyline in the Cloud Gate in Millenium Park; and a photo of Dianne, Rebekah & Paul at the sign for Millenium Park.)